Dear Bowels,
I don't generally make it a habit to write letters to my body parts, but you, my friend, are very special. You're important to me. You were pretty lazy in the past, up until the last few years, you would only work about once a week or every two weeks. However, lately, you've been pretty good to me... And I've been pretty good to you, with all that brown rice I've been eating as of late.
So, I wanted to ask you: what changed?
After a day of excruciating pain and nausea, followed by bouts of explosive diarrhea I finally figured out
that the cause of my pain, nausea, etc. in the beginning of the week
was probably caused by fecal impaction. Again. This is the second time in less than a year. WTF, bowels, do your job... It's not THAT difficult. Billions of other people's bowels do it just fine every day. That's not an exaggeration, either.
The doctor's advice last time (after she decided to stick her fingers up my anus, which wasn't pleasant for either of us, was it?) was to just take laxatives for a while until you get used to pooping again, that's what I've been doing.
Yet, still (STILL) you plague me.
Now I have back pain, and the need to go at least twice a day... Which is good, I guess. But PLEASE stop letting go, every time I go pee, making it so that there's only enough to make it a full wiping session, but never enough to even reach the bowl. Ugh. What a waste of toilet paper.
Anyways, we're in this for the long haul, and I know that. I just want to ask you to be a bit kinder to me, and in return I'll eat as many vegetables and brown rice as you want. I mean it this time.
Very truly yours,
Kim.
Side note: I read online about causes of fecal impaction and one of them was taking laxatives. Which worries me, because the doctor prescribed laxatives to cure the impaction. WTF?
What body part do you have the most problems with?
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